Big Bro Has A Special Message For Bully Who Picked On His Little Sister Because He Is Gay

When Joseph Flinders, a radio producer from Manchester, found out that his little sister Lola was being bullied by a boy at school who said it was “disgusting” she had a gay brother, Flinders posted an open letter addressed to the boy on Facebook.

The 21-year-old also included this photo of his 11-year-old sister attending a gay pride parade.

Here is Flinders message:


An open letter to the odious little toad who gave my baby sister a hard time for having a gay big brother. I just wanted to give an example of what a decent upbringing looks like. This is a photo I took of us at the gay pride parade, which she asked to attend with me. I think that’s pretty cool of an eleven year old, don’t you?

I’ve never known such an accepting, compassionate, loving child and I don’t want your hate-filled existence making her any less than she is.

I’m not confrontational but this is a nerve I wouldn’t touch if I were you. Thankfully, you’re a dying breed and I imagine this is the last generation that’ll have to endure narrow-minded tools.

I think she’s pretty great and she’s prouder than ever to tell people her brother is gay. So enjoy spreading hate to nobody that gives a toss.

Hundreds applauded Joseph for sticking up for his sister.


Flinders’ mother Debra shared this message:

“You have to feel a bit (and only a teeny weeny bit) sorry for kids like the ‘odious toad’ mentioned…because they weren’t born homophobic; they are obviously being influenced by family members…I am so proud of you as my son and as a really lovely, hardworking, intelligent and extremely funny bloke. I am equally proud of my little Lola, who is the sweetest and sassiest girl I know.”

Buzzfeed interviewed Flinders, asking him what led to the Facebook post:

I was babysitting Lola last night and as she was going to sleep she started getting a bit teary and I said, “What’s wrong?” And she said, “I don’t want to tell you because you’ll be upset.” And I said, “I doubt it, Lola, it’s not very easy to upset me.” But she was right, it did upset me – because she was upset about it.

She said he was talking to somebody in her class about how she got on really well with me and this girl said, “Oh I’ve got a big brother, too. He’s gay.” And Lola said, “Oh, so is my brother!” And then a boy in their class overheard them talking and he told them both how “disgusting” it was.

When asked how his little sister responded to the boy, Flinders said she just “brushed it off and told him, “It’s got nothing to do with you, just leave me alone.” But shortly afterwards she said she was sobbing a bit in the class and asked to go to the bathroom. She’s a bit delicate. That’s why it upset me.

Flinders also shared how he came out to Lola:

“She asked me one day, when I had my first boyfriend. She just said, “Joe, can I ask you something?” And I said, “Yeah, sure, what’s up?” She said, “Are you gay?” And I said, “Yeah.” And then she went, “OK. Can I have a yoghurt?” And off to the fridge she went! She’s fab, she didn’t have any preconceptions – my mum has lots of gay friends – so it was just really lovely and easy. I love her to bits.”